Kevin Hellriegel's Blog of Worthless Advice

The only blog that you really want to read…or ignore.

I can’t sell my kids but….Oh, more stuff for sale! Make an Offer!

My daughter and I have been cleaning up the house.  We attempted to disrupt the mess in the guest bedroom/dog’s room.  We sold an old desk my cousin had given me for $25.  So we thought, “Heck, let’s post other things on Offer Up! and Craig’s List”.

Let’s sell some of our treasures!

How about an old school desk?

image1

http://seattle.craigslist.org/skc/fuo/5714930780.html

How about something cool for the dorm room?  Man cave? Garage?  Check out my old Traffic Lights and Crosswalk Lights!

http://seattle.craigslist.org/skc/fuo/5714918666.html8666.html

We may have been a little too excited and priced the items too high.  So we are will to take offers.  I know someone will score!

Oh, it’s Yard Sale Season? The Best 7 Worthless Advice Tips to make it a HUGE success!

It’s summer here and that means there are a fair amount of yard sales in my local community.  It’s like a gold rush of junk and the everyone wants to sell their treasures!  I enjoy a good garage sale like the next guy (if that guy happens to be a hoarder).  You can find some good tools, cheap books, dangerous toys, out of style clothes, and dead Nana’s ashes.

Perhaps you want to sell your Treasures?   Follow my Tips for Huge Garage Sales!

  1. Get Rid of Your Spouse and Children – You don’t want your sentimental, sappy husband or your whining kids mucking up the sales process with their cries of “But that was my favorite bike” or “I still need that hammer to fix the gate” or “I need that heart medication to survive.”
  2. Sell High Quality Items –  Sure, that is pretty easy right?  You know what sells?  Your neighbor’s stuff.  Like their brand new lawn furniture or their ECHO weed wacker.  Or that bratty kid’s bike down the street.  Just slip them into our inventory, price them dirt cheap (like your wife’s perfume), and watch the money roll in.
  3. Advertise Your Yard Sale –  Make sure to make a big sign and hot glue it to the neighbor’s car down on the corner.  Hey, if he is stupid enough to park image2his car on the public street, then it can become a good spot for a nice sign to direct traffic to your awesome garage sale.
  4. Put on Some Music – Have your nephew and his gangsta rap music group have a concert outside.  Nothing like a bunch of swear words to get those Buyers itching to buy!
  5. Selling on a Hot Day?  Some would suggest selling lemonade…I would add Vodka and get the sales party started.  Everyone knows that liquor helps to loosen up those tight purse strings.  And what could go wrong with vodka infused lemonade at 9:32 am?
  6. Need something for the Husbands to do?  Husbands get bored at garage sales.  To combat this, start a craps game in the backyard.  Everyone loves craps!  Remember the longer they are playing, the longer their wives are at the garage sale buying your stuff!
  7. All Sales Final – Don’t forget to remind your customers that all sales are final.  They are stuck with your treasures now!

After those final customers sober up, you can get rid of the reminder items on Craig’s List for FREE!

Do you have some awesome tips or a story to share?  Leave them in the comments below!

 

 

 

 

Meet my friend Craig’s List

Since it is summer time, we have a few chores around my house that we need to finish up.  One is clearing out the “treasures” (worthless crap) we have accumulated over the years but have no good use for anymore.  Granted, at one time I thought I did need a huge pink “Hello Kitty” desk for my office to be a successful blogger, but now I know I don’t (mainly because I’m not a successful blogger).  Besides, my imaginary stalker Cyndi said she would gladly take it off my hands anytime I needed her to.

Unlike my worthless advice I offer to you my dear readers, some of these items are good, usable items.  And you know I really hate making the trip to the local garbage dump when I know a lot of my treasures could have a second life with someone else.  That’s when I turn to my friend Craig’s List.

Sure, some people are scared of Craig’s List (because who isn’t scared of meeting a stranger in a back alley for new flat screen TV?) but when you want to avoid making a trip to the garbage dump, Craig’s List can be your best friend.  Now that I don’t have a truck, it is hard for me to take large items to the garbage dump, donation center, or the recycling center.  Instead of me asking my friend to borrow his truck, I throw everything up on Craig’s List for free.

Today, I got rid of some really cool solar water heater panels.  They aren’t as bad as having a broken down wash machine in your front hard, but solar panels were nice but a wind storm had knocked them over and the glass was destroyed.  I had a few problems setting up the solar water heater system last year, then replacing the glass seemed expensive (4 ft x 8 ft sheets), and they didn’t fit into my “White Trash Theme” I have going on in the backyard, so I decided to get rid of them.  Now, I’m sure I could have sold them on Craig’s List but sometimes that is more of a hassle that the money I’d make out of the project.

This morning I posted the ad and within 30 minutes, two guys came and picked them up. As a bonus, they also picked up all my other free junk out in the driveway.  It was awesome.  I just saved myself about $50 in dump fees and a trip to the Bow Lake Transfer Station.

If you are worried about people coming to your house, you can also put your treasures on the corner of your neighborhood with a “free” sign on it.  I have a neighbor who is gone 11 months of the year so we usually put all the items in front of his house.  Plus, I have an awesome view of watching people gathering up my “treasures”.

That’s your worthless advice tip of the day!  Keep on getting rid of those treasures!

Someone is having a bad day—U-Haul crashes into Historic Seattle Landmark

Sometimes you just want to move your belongings from one place to another.  These poor folks decided to take their U-Haul moving truck through the beautiful Seattle Arboretum.  Why not?  It’s a short cut, it’s a nice drive, and what could go wrong?  Click on the link to KOMO news (one of our local broadcast news channels).

I’m hoping they opted for the “extra insurance coverage”.  I know your regular auto insurance usually covers small accidents but most of us have deductibles ranging from $100 to $1000.  The one time I opted for the additional coverage when I rented a moving van (14 years ago), it was worth it.  It was a small additional charge that covered EVERYTHING.  I managed to scrap a long line in the wood deck of the Public Storage moving van and they wanted to charge me for it.  It was a moving van and it was normal wear and tear.  Then the guy saw I had opted for the additional coverage and said I didn’t have to worry about it.

If you think about it, unless you are a commercial truck driver and use to a large vehicle, it makes sense to get the extra coverage and talk with your insurance coverage before you rent the truck.  Sure, it is cool you are moving from your parents’ basement into an overpriced apartment near Green Lake, but you need to cover yourself.  Think how this poor guy’s weekend is now ruined.

Click on the link below to check out more photos.

http://komonews.com/news/local/u-haul-truck-crashes-into-historic-seattle-landmark

Drone Video: Lincoln Rock State Park

Enjoy this video of Lincoln Rock State Park!

Lincoln Rock State Park is located about 4 miles north of Wenatchee, Washington on the east side of the Columbia River.

Summer Camp for Adults? Cash on In!

FullSizeRenderSummer is here and a few years back I read about Adult Summer Camps.  I didn’t pay much attention to the Adult Summer Camp craze because I was too busy being, you know, a parent.  Besides, I’ve done my fair share of camping, backpacking, and attending summer camps as a young Boy Scout and also as a Boy Scout troop leader.  Oh, and don’t forget my trips to various Girl Scout camps with my daughter as well.  So you can imagine, I’m not too interested in sleeping a musty old cabin eating bad food at the dining hall as an adult because we now have an Adult Summer Camp opportunities abound.

So, you see, the idea of Adult Summer Camp doesn’t really appeal to me.  However, I can see that it is a great idea because it already exists and someone is making some money.  However, I believed these “summer camps” are called business conventionsand trade shows and held in places like hotels.  Usually  you have to attend because your job requires you to.  Or you could go for pleasure and attend something like Comicon.  You know, a place where you can dress up in a costume just like you do on Halloween.  There is nothing wrong with that.  It is a hobby and hobbies are something you enjoy doing and I strongly encourage you to attend a convention if you want to.  I just don’t understand why someone wants to head out to the woods and go back to summer camp.  I’d much rather head to a hotel and enjoy the pool and spa services.

Of course, I’m a fool for not cashing in on the Adult Summer Camp craze.  I know a number of experts (aka friends) that could assist me in creating a new summer camp.  If someone wants to pay me to attend a summer camp, who am I to stop them?

What courses would I offer?  The list is endless!

  • Lawn Mowing and Lawn Care
  • Complaining & Whining
  • Photography
  • House Painting
  • Blogging
  • Cheap Vacations
  • Car Maintenance
  • How to Fail
  • Drone Flying (and Crashing!)
  • Home Beer Brewing (and its sister course Beer Drinking)
  • How to Be Depressed in Your Life without Mental Illness
  • Boating and Floating
  • Camping Basics
  • Candle Making
  • Wine Drinking
  • Scotch and Whisky Drinking

Pretty much whatever you can imagine, we could offer it as a course.  I could rent some old summer camp, set up some old army tents, get some retired school cook for my mess hall, and we would have our summer camp up and running in no time.  Daily Field trips to the local pub for inspiration would be a must.  Hands on experience (like painting my house) with a touch of reality (see my highly regarded course “How to Fail”).

I know you are dying to sign up.  For only $1499 per week, this summer camp experience can be yours.  You can send me cash anytime.  I promise to save your spot for you.

Have a great idea for a course?  Want to be a part of a winning team (or you need a job for the summer)?  Let me know!  Frankly, I need all the help I can get.

 

 

 

 

Vacation Post: Chelan, Washington

It has taken me a few days to get out of work mode and into vacation mode.  We are staying about 3.5 hours (driving time) from our house which results in hotter weather with clear blue skies.  As you have probably gathered from past blog posts, the western Washington area is usually cloudy, wet, and cool (55-65 degrees F).  However, once you drive over Snoqulamie Pass and enter the eastern side of the state, you get hot, dry desert weather.  We now have high 80s to low 90s, clear blue skies.  Did I mention blue skies?  Yeah, we can see the sun here.

Now, summer is the best time to be in Seattle because the cloudy skies are really now blue skies.  The weather is good.  The new channel is teasing us with reports of sunshine and temperatures of 70-80.

The Lake Chelan area is beautiful.  It use to be just apple orchard country, mixed in with some cherries, and then a sprinkle of vacation condo resorts (lots of timeshares here).  Over the past 15 years, Chelan has added about 23 wineries and more tourist activities such as ziplines, jet skis and boat rentals, etc.  There is a great and affordable family waterslide park called “Slidewaters”.  Great local pizza joints and hamburger places.  Heck, and there is sunshine every darn day!

300 days of sunshine…you can’t complain about that especially when it comes with a 55 miles long lake with clear blue water.

Sorry Sir, your T-Shirt isn’t going to survive.

As summer approaches, it is time we assess our T-Shirt collection and we bid farewell to some of our old T-shirt friends.

For women, this would seem like a normal course of action.  That t-shirt was so last week; time to get rid of it..  However, to a man, this is akin to losing a good friend to a random softball accident while playing the nuns of Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow and Misery on a hot Saturday afternoon.  You never think it will happen but when it does: you must say good-bye to a dear friend rather quickly.

You have to understand the simple fact that men love their t-shirts.  They remind us that life can be casual and care-free.  You know, like the time before we had a life full of responsibilities, work headaches, kids, and the crazy neighbors.  A time when you could know that whatever day it was, a t-shirt would be the appropriate shirt to wear for that occasion.  A kid’s birthday party?  T-shirt time! Going out to a club tonight?  T-shirt time!  Attending a funeral for your girlfriend’s great aunt? It’s black T-shirt time!  Hanging out with your friends at the court-house?  It’s T-shirt time!

I recently pulled out a shirt from the dryer only to discover it had holes in the back of it.  Not the arm pits or the front of the shirt, it was the back of the shirt.  It was a sad day.  That t-shirt has traveled many miles….it has been a good friend.  Whether I worn it to bed or out to the local grocery store; it was comfortable friend who was always there for me.  Sadly, no amount of duct tape will spare it from becoming a garage rag.

Here’s to you old faithful friend…I bid you a fond farewell.  May your life as a cleaning rag serve be just as fun as the time we ran our mountain bike up a tree while texting and drinking a Slurpee.  We both know it won’t be fun but we are going to pretend it will be.

Good Bye T-shirt…..

 

Long Beach, Washington – Father’s Day 2016

On Sunday, my son, his friend, and I made a quick trip to Long Beach, Washington to create some drone video footage and take some drone photos.  The last time I was in Long Beach was with the family for a short lunch stop so I was pleased to have the opportunity to visit again and stay a bit longer.

The weather was perfect for enjoying Long Beach.  Clear blue skies and a bright sun for us however, it was very windy.  Long Beach is know for its excellent kite flying conditions.  Plenty of wind on Sunday and Monday if you like kite flying, seagulls, and assorted windy day activities.

We stayed in Jazzy’s Crab Shack Link to Jazzy’s Crab Shack and it was great for the three of us.  Two bedrooms and a queen hide away bed in the living room area, two bathrooms, dining room area, plus a well stocked kitchen with a breakfast nook.  The vacation cottage was very clean and looked like it is well maintained by the owners.

Monday’s weather was a bit more cloudy but the wind was about the same.  After driving around the area a bit, you realize that the beach is pretty far away.  It is wide and (of course) it is long (hence the name “Long Beach”).  In Washington State, you can drive on the beach (in certain areas).

The visit was short but still fun.  Hopefully, when you get the chance to visit Long Beach, the weather will be warm and sunny for your visit.

 

 

 

 

Thank You Idiot Parent Dropping off Your Kid at school today; you make my day even more miserable than it already is.

Parent drop offThe last day of school was last Friday and it was the last time I dropped off my spoiled little princess for the school year.  Sure, we should make her walk the half mile to school but we don’t.  We would much rather subject ourselves to the misery of the Student Drop Off Line in the morning.  You would think that after 180 days of dropping off their kids, more parents wouldn’t be complete idiots when it comes to dropping off their kids in front of the school.

Seriously, they have had 180 drop offs.  Can’t they figure this out by now?  But every morning when I drop off my princess, some moron in front of me stops short and plugs up the whole system.  It really isn’t that difficult to figure out that you drive all the way to the end of the semi-circle driveway and then drop off your kid.  You don’t stop at the beginning and let them out.  When you drop them off at the beginning, it stops the whole flow.

See all the free space in front of you?  Use your common sense and move up.  See all the cars behind you WAITING for you to move?   That’s because we aren’t morons and can see that there are other parents that are dropping off their kids too.  We know that we need to move as far up as possible so that the whole system works.  You, on the other hand, are a complete moron who thinks of no one but themselves.

I bet you hate puppies and snowflakes too.

Maybe next year, you can figure out this incredibly easy drop off system.  Until school starts up again in the fall, I bid you a fond farewell.

"I want to be inside your darkest everything" `Frida Kahlo

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