Sorry Sir, your T-Shirt isn’t going to survive.

As summer approaches, it is time we assess our T-Shirt collection and we bid farewell to some of our old T-shirt friends.

For women, this would seem like a normal course of action.  That t-shirt was so last week; time to get rid of it..  However, to a man, this is akin to losing a good friend to a random softball accident while playing the nuns of Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow and Misery on a hot Saturday afternoon.  You never think it will happen but when it does: you must say good-bye to a dear friend rather quickly.

You have to understand the simple fact that men love their t-shirts.  They remind us that life can be casual and care-free.  You know, like the time before we had a life full of responsibilities, work headaches, kids, and the crazy neighbors.  A time when you could know that whatever day it was, a t-shirt would be the appropriate shirt to wear for that occasion.  A kid’s birthday party?  T-shirt time! Going out to a club tonight?  T-shirt time!  Attending a funeral for your girlfriend’s great aunt? It’s black T-shirt time!  Hanging out with your friends at the court-house?  It’s T-shirt time!

I recently pulled out a shirt from the dryer only to discover it had holes in the back of it.  Not the arm pits or the front of the shirt, it was the back of the shirt.  It was a sad day.  That t-shirt has traveled many miles….it has been a good friend.  Whether I worn it to bed or out to the local grocery store; it was comfortable friend who was always there for me.  Sadly, no amount of duct tape will spare it from becoming a garage rag.

Here’s to you old faithful friend…I bid you a fond farewell.  May your life as a cleaning rag serve be just as fun as the time we ran our mountain bike up a tree while texting and drinking a Slurpee.  We both know it won’t be fun but we are going to pretend it will be.

Good Bye T-shirt…..


5 thoughts on “Sorry Sir, your T-Shirt isn’t going to survive.

  1. I’ve been unsuccessful in my attempts to get my husband to rid himself of the t shirts with holes. So I started asking if I can have them.

    Then I wore them to color my hair. Or my friend’s hair. Or when I paint. By the time he realized what I was doing, it was too late.

    Yes, I’m sure retaliation is coming someday… but I’ll let Future Me worry about that.

  2. I am not a man but I can’t get rid of t-shirts (and lots of other things). I don’t have quite the severe problem my husband has. But there is a giant bin of unwearable t-shirts in my attic. “I’ll make them into pillows.” Unless I’m building a room with walls padded with pillows, this is not a solution. I’ve got one t-shirt in a drawer of my bedside table that resembles a spiderweb. Not printed with a picture of a spiderweb… but worn out to basically a shredded look. It was given to me by my first serious boyfriend. Can’t get rid of it! (I know, I have a problem…)

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