Category: vacation

Yup! You were right…Your Spouse is trying to kill you!

~ K ~ 2 Comments

I have som20140316-060511.jpge bad news for you folks that work and help support the family.  It appears that your spouse is trying to kill you.

Shocking?  A bit…but not unexpected, is it?

The news gets worse if you are a woman.

It seems that if you are a working woman, those long hours at your job are more detrimental to your health than to a man’s health.  Does this mean you can’t handle it?  Hardly.  It means your spouse is trying to kill you by making you work!  It also probably means you care a bit more about your job than your lazy husband.  You know he doesn’t care about his job.  He is just worried about what he is having for lunch.  You are the one who has to get up at 5 am, shower, put your make up on, catch the train, walk the remaining half mile to your job, scan in using your keycard, listening to your lame boss, eat lunch at your desk, create a value added spreadsheet, work some more, suffer through yet another meeting, rush to catch the train back, and walk uphill back to your house, and eat some leftover frozen pizza your husband somehow managed to find in the freezer.

And what about your husband?  Eating some Ben and Jerry’s ice cream as he watches that baseball game on TV.  Look at that smug look in his eyes as he takes another heap of ice cream from the bowl into his waiting mouth.  I bet he has a beer on the table too.  You can tell he doesn’t care.

You? You’re different.  You know you rock at your job.  You do the best you can…you care.

Him?  He doesn’t care.  He just wants to talk about sports during his hour long, three martini lunches.  That selfish ass.

He knows that $3 Million Dollar life insurance policy is on your head and he is planning to get his hands on that money one way or another.

Watch out for that harmless vacation to Kauai.  You never know what hiking trail he plans to take you on.

Hold on now…what if you are a man?

What about it?  You know your’e dead inside already.  Your spouse is just helping you slide down the final few feet to your doom.  It’s perfectly ok; you were meant to be a clog in the machine.  Just sit back and enjoy that bowl of ice cream, everything will be just fine.

Source: MSN Health

 

 

Windows are for Winners! (and that’s why I’m sitting here by the window!)

~ K ~ 9 Comments
Image courtesy of Alaska Airlines (whom should be sponsoring my blog)
Image courtesy of Alaska Airlines (whom should be sponsoring my blog)

On my recent trip to the Big Island, I left a few days before my wife and travelled by myself. Like many others, I love to take vacations and fly in airplanes. I enjoy sitting, looking out the window at the clouds, think about my cat Mr. Whiskers, enjoying the landscape below, with the knowledge that in a few hours, a new adventure awaits for me. When my wife and kids travel with me, I give up the window seat to one of them. I’ll get stuck on the aisle seat or the middle seat (I’m usually stuck in Coach because this blog isn’t a national success as of yet and I can’t afford First Class).

So, the highlight of the flight was when the little kid next to me wanted to look out the window. He asked his mom if she would ask me if I could change seats to the aisle seat.

What? First of all; man up kid, you are five years old…talk to me yourself. Stop being a whiner. Second, I don’t want to sit by the aisle because I know this kid and his mother will have to go to the bathroom 15 times during the flight, Third, the flight attendant will bump my elbow EVERYTIME she goes by with the drink cart, Finally, you know some lady will need to get something out of the overhead bin (right above my head), it will be too heavy, and she’ll drop it on my head (thus awaking me up and annoying me). Just leave me alone.

I turned to the kid, raise my left hand, slowly pulled the shade down, and said to the kid.

“Windows are for winners and you aren’t a winner.”  Then, with a smile on my face, push the “Play” button on the podcast I was listening to (“How to be a Sarcastic Jerk Podcast Episode 167), closed my eyes and started my vacation.

(if you haven’t figure this out by now…this didn’t happen…work of sarcastic fiction…well, the flight and vacation to the Big Island did happen).

Again, why hasn't the Royal Kona Resort asked me to blog for them?
Again, why hasn’t the Royal Kona Resort asked me to blog for them?

Oh, I’m sorry, did you say something about how I talk?

~ K ~ 15 Comments

I’ve been having problems with certain “words” in my life.  I’m making the effort to eliminate the following words and phrases:

Basically

Actually

Technically

….And something

… And stuff

I think…

I’ll try….

Let’s get into the meat of the situation, we all have phrases that we say that begin to drive us crazy. My least favorite is my habit of saying “and something”. 

For example:

“The battery is very large and something.”  Of course the battery is “and something”.  I feel like a dork every time I say it.  Please, help me stop the use of the “and something”.

And like Yoda says I shouldn’t “try”, I should “do” it.

Instead of me saying “I’ll try to mow the lawn.”

No, instead “I will now the lawn.” (Unless it is raining….who wants to mow the lawn in the rain?).

In an effort to be specific, I’m switching to:

I will….

Don’t forget about “basically”.  I recently started to listen to the radio show “Loveline” again (via podcast) and every time someone says “basically”, they ring a bell. Now, everything time I hear the word “basically”, I hear that bell go off in my head.  I have been conditioned just like Pavlov’s dog; I hear the word “basically” and the bell goes off.  Now where is my treat?

“And stuff”

I use “and stuff” when I’m talking and it is annoying. I wouldn’t write it but I find myself saying “Here comes Clark with the report and stuff.” Really?  That just came out of my mouth?

Please don’t get me wrong; I’m not trying to come off as a snobby speaker of the English language. I’m a terrible speaker and mispronounce words all the time (I blame my parents….but who doesn’t blame their parents for all their problems?). I’m focusing on my own poor speech patterns and phrases. For pete’s sake, this blog isn’t about you, ok? These items are things I want to fix about myself. And who says I can’t change (besides my wife and kids?).

One more that I don’t use but I hate:

Honestly and To be honest with you….

“Honestly, I don’t know what you mean that I crashed the car.”

“To be honest with you, I’d never eat the last cookie.”

You weren’t honest before?  I don’t use those word phrases but they drive me crazy when I hear them.

So basically (ding), I’m trying to tell you that I need to work on myself and stuff, so that I think I can become a better person and something.

Actually, that was painful to write and then read.

Have a wonderful day! 

 

A Visit to the Big Seattle Boat Show!

~ K ~ 3 Comments

Sometimes I come up with some odd ideas on what I should be doing with my life.  Last summer, I had the strange notion that I should be a yacht salesperson.  I honestly thought it would be a fun and glorious summer job.  Sitting at my desk at the marina, the sun shining outside, the wind gently blowing, and the yachts gleaming outside.  Rich people would just stop by, I’d take them out for a test cruise, and I’d sell a yacht a day.

Luckily, my laziness and my desire to enjoy myself kept me from a life of khaki slacks, boat shoes, and washing seagull crap off some yacht on Lake Union.

Instead of becoming a boat salesman, my son and I went to the Big Seattle Boat Show yesterday.  Now, I haven’t been to a boat show since I was a kid so this was both a blessing and a curse.  A blessing because it is extremely fun to see the variety of yachts and boats available (and this was only the ones they could bring inside on trailers).  A curse because the boats I like are in the price range of $600,000 to $900,000.  Sure, I could get by with a smaller boat but once you look at a $800,000 yacht, the $225,000 is small and not really up to your standards.  The $1.3 Million yacht wasn’t even that attractive.  I would have to pass on it.

I would also like a yacht that isn’t too big where I would need a crew to run it.  I want to be able to handle it with myself and my wife.  I know; I’m a bit picky when it comes to big boats.

I also wouldn’t mind a retired classic Coast Guard cutter or even an older working boat (tug, fishing vessel) that had some space on it.  Retrofit that baby with some modern electronics and you’d a vessel that would have some style to it, yet be fun to be on.

 

However, unless I win the Power Ball Lottery, I won’t be buying a new boat anytime soon.  Besides, who wants to worry about having to find a boat slip, fueling it up, getting through the Ballard Locks?  Am I right?

Drone video footage of the ferry “Ocean City” in Oro Bay on Anderson Island, WA

~ K ~ Leave a comment

Anderson Island, WA – Drone Footage of ferry boat “Ocean City” in Oro Bay

Enjoy this drone footage of the retired ferry boat “Ocean City” now docked in Oro Bay, Anderson Island, WA.  Oro Bay is located in the southeast section of Anderson Island.  The ferry boat “Ocean City” was actually sailed over from the east coast of the United States via the Panama Canal.

Interested in learning more about the ferry? Click:  “Ocean City” Ferry Boat information

Here is another article (from 1998) from the AP News: Floating RV Park?

A 1993 Seattle Times story: Oro Bay Ferry

Flying the drone on Anderson Island, WA

 

Hold On…I’m busy designing my vacation home!

~ K ~ 7 Comments

Sure, not everyone has the time to design an amazing vacation home like I do. But then again, most people have real jobs and work for a company that wants them to produce a measurable amount of productive work. I, on the other hand, am a slave to myself and, frankly, my own worst nightmare as a boss.  I show up late, watch funny cat videos (with my co-worker Mr. Whiskers), and drink on the job (while operating heavy machinery). Well, if you count my desktop as heavy machinery….

So you can imagine how I quickly jumped onto the chance to read a recent article from The Washington Post titled “Three Tips to Avoid Headaches when designing a vacation home”.  I won’t ruin the article for you but the first tip is to be wealthy enough to afford a vacation home you can design.  That wasn’t one of the tips but it should have been because who has a the time and money for a vacation home?

Now, I have designed numerous vacation homes in my mind, and have even made drawings in my sketchbook (of lost hopes and broken dreams) so that I don’t forget my ideas. My designs vary from the recycled 20 foot ocean crossing storage container home, to the midrange 1000 SF cabin, to the 5,000 trilevel overlooking Lake Chelan.  In fact, half of my future vacation home will be a “man cave” in the style of industrial chic while the other half will be whatever my wife wants. Really, we both have to live there together so I have to be sure to make her happy.  Because we know if she isn’t happy, then I won’t be happy.

My next thought is: Is this a “vacation” home or my “retirement” home?  Are they one in the same?  Because I basically hate people, I would like a home out in the middle of nowhere.  A small town or city feel to it.   I really don’t want to be social.  One other idea: I’d like to have an outbuilding that is a simple Japanese style dojo. Which then makes me wonder if I should have a home with a courtyard in it and thus more in the style of an Asian country home. 

As an introvert, living in a rural setting would suit me fine.  Yes, I do like to hang out with dear friends so my vacation home will need a few guest bedrooms. Or better yet, cottages for guest to visit.

In the meantime, I’ll work and see if I can’t finish the rest of my working career.

How to Handle Stress like the Whiner You Are!

~ K ~ Leave a comment

Let’s visit our good friend: Stress.  As an expert of worthless advice, I can say: We all have it. Some of us handle it better than others. Some of us have an undue amount of it. Little things might stress you out while those same little things are not stressful at all for someone else.  How do we deal with stress?

We whine about it. We complain and whine about how much stress we have. But you know what? That’s OK…we should vent and complain. That helps to release the stress. Keeping all that stressed bottle up inside isn’t good. Let it out. Complain. I give you permission to whine, vent, and release your stress.

The key to dealing with stress is to compartmentize it. Just focus on the task at hand and not worry about the stress. Overcome your stress by putting it on the back burner while you do your job. You are volunteering at an animal shelter? Focus on the animals and put that stress in a different part of your mind, enjoy the moment of helping others.

The stress of your job getting to you? Take a walk and don’t think about it. You need to have “me” time to defeat stress AND recharge.  No one says you need to think about your job and stress out about it 24 hours a day.

Best of luck to you in your fight against stress!

Pilot Ridge Hike – 30 miles in 3 Days

~ K ~ Leave a comment

This coming weekend I’m headed out on a 3 Day/30 mile Boy Scout backpacking trip outside of Darrington, WA. We will be hiking the Pilot Ridge Hike picked by one of my senior scouts (who runs cross country and is in great shape). So you can imagine, I’m a little concerned about the least fit members of our backpacking trip. I’ve nicknamed it Anthony’s Death March in his honor.

The weather conditions this coming weekend will be sun and showers on Friday, with mostly clear skies on Saturday and Sunday.   I’m not too worried about the weather. I’m more worried about the actual hiking and backpacking. The elevation gain and loss on this hike is quite a bit. The bonus of sleeping outside two nights on the hard ground is also a big draw. Hmm, nice hard ground instead of my soft bed. Gee, I can’t wait.

I’m not too worried about the backpacking part except for my backpack will be much larger than my day pack. You have to carry everything you need for three days. At least it is summer time here so I can carry less of my backup gear. I still carry all of the Ten Essentials…plus #11 Toilet Paper and #12 Duct Tape.

http://www.wta.org/hiking-info/basics/ten-essentials

I don’t have a problem hiking. In fact, I did some high elevation hiking in Colorado in July. But backpacking is a lot different than car camping. You don’t have a nice established campsite with easy access to water and flush toilets. Camping in the backcountry is you, out there in the wilderness, making sure you have enough food and water for your entire stay. You have to be prepared. You need a decent shelter, food, water, a water filter/pump, and a handy dandy Hello Kitty LED flashlight.

When I was younger, I loved to do backpacking and camping. I still enjoy being outside hiking; the backpacking part isn’t as appealing as it once was. I’m older and sleeping on the ground just isn’t that enjoyable.

Needless to say, I’m looking forward to doing a backpacking trip with my son. We have gone camping a lot as a family and on numerous Boy Scout camping trips. This will be a fun final trip before he gets his Eagle Scout rank.

Do you have any fun day hikes or backpacking trips planned?

 

What's for dinner?
What’s for dinner?

Kauai, Maui, Sunny March Weather in Seattle! Oh My!

~ K ~ 1 Comment

IMG_5778Yesterday, we had some beautiful sunny March weather here in Seattle. I was actually out on my back deck enjoying the sunshine and working on my suntan. It must have been about 65-70 degrees out. Even after we “sprung” ahead into Daylight Savings Time, I got some stuff around the house accomplished. So spending a few minutes on the back deck with my wife and daughter was a treat that was well deserved.

We usually, have pretty gray weather around here in March but not lately. Last week, we went hiking in the sun.   I have been able to preserve my Hawaii tan for a lot longer than I thought I would. Yes, dear readers, I was gone for two weeks to Hawaii in February. I spent a week on Kauai with my daughter visiting my parents and then we flew to Maui and join my wife and my son for another week. Life is rough.

My last trip to Hawaii was two years ago and that was to Kauai. I haven’t been to Maui in 15 years. To be honest, both are wonderful places but I prefer Kauai. I admit I lean towards Kauai (since I went to school there and lived on Kauai as a teenager). My wife likes Maui because she use to live there. As I always say, Hawaii is a great place to visit but not as fun to live there.

Koi Fish Pond
Koi Fish Pond

What? How can I say that? How can I say Hawaii isn’t an awesome place to live? When you take a vacation, everything is awesome. I’m relaxed, I don’t worry about money, and I’m living in a nice condo resort with hot tubs, swimming pools, and sunny beaches. I picture myself relaxing and drinking every day of my life if I lived in Hawaii. Heck, every time I’m on vacation I think how wonderful it would be to live in Washington, NYC, Eastern Washington, etc. Where ever I am at, I can picture me enjoying living there. My family and I would be hanging out at the pool every day. In reality, you have to work or you would be retired. Ah, retirement. But you would be doing the same thing as you would be doing now. Just in a warmer, humid climate.

Now, I’m not turning down the opportunity to move to Kauai or Hawaii in general if someone offered me a job there. Both my wife and I know what it is like to live there.   But rest assured dear readers, I’m still a few years away from retirement, I haven’t won the lottery, and my online business hasn’t taken off where I can retire from school photography just yet.

Do you have a place you wish you could move to? What is holding you back from moving or even taking a vacation?Kaua'i - The Garden Isle