Month: September 2014

Another Ferry Boat Ride – this time to Lopez Island

~ K ~ 6 Comments

Today, was “Bring your Wife to Work” day at my office. Considering I am a self-employed photographer, I have a few quirky work days I have to deal with. Where is the HR director when you need her? Anyway, one of my school accounts is located on beautiful Lopez Island. Lopez Island is located in the northern Puget Sound area of Washington State and is part of the San Juan Islands. There are a couple of great search engines you can use if you really want to know more. I’m far too tired to even think about inserting a helpful link here.

We got up at 3 am, so we could catch a 6:20 am ferry. As you can see, that is bloody early. To say the least I am tired. However, the day seem to go by a lot faster since I did have my wife with me. It was a fun little break for the two of us and it was a decent road trip. This is one of the few times, I wasn’t worried about rushing home to be with her and the kids. And to be honest, I’m sure the kids didn’t notice us missing.

Yes, the day was a successful one. I love and hate the Washington State Ferries. Love them because they hold a bunch of fond childhood memories. Hate them because the ferry schedule is a nasty beast. There is an average of four hours of waiting for the next ferry if you miss your desired boat. Not fun. I’ve been that car that had been denied and it sucks big time. Just make sure you have some good books on your Kindle if you miss your ferry.

As always your worthless comments are welcome. I’m sorry this blog post is a bit boring and worthless. However, this is my blog about worthless advice so enjoy it while you can!

Update: Fat Ass Dads Weight Loss Challenge

~ K ~ 2 Comments

I have a few minutes while riding the ferry to Anderson Island to give you an update you are all dying for: The Fat Ass Dads Weight Loss Challenge.

My group of overweight fat ass dads have started our weight loss challenge and most are doing fairly well. A couple of us are actually losing weight in this challenge so it is doing a good thing. One of my friends is down 5 lbs, another 10 lbs, and I’m down 8 lbs. I haven’t heard of any other weight loss from the rest of the fat ass dads. They probably don’t want to hear anymore of my worthless advice about weight loss until they hit their personal plateaus.

A few dads “forget” to mention to their wives and family that they were involved in the challenge. I think these characters are the same dads who refuse to read my worthless advice blog. The fools!! I personally think they were trying get out of the weight loss challenge. They are trying not to do it. But like the mafia, I can reach you were ever you try to hide. Sooner or later, I’ll bump into your wife at Costco or come over to your house for dinner and I’ll steer the conversation to the Fat Ass Dad Weight Loss Challenge. And you know what? Your wife will commit your sorry ass to the challenge. You can run but you can’t hide. There is no escape.

Now, we have the habitual offenders who are still eating donuts and drinking Big Gulps instead of making the commitment. I can’t complain; they just make it easier for me to take their money when this is all said and done.

Personally, I’ve dropped bread from my diet, stop drinking beer, and drink a few drinks of scotch or whiskey on the weekend. I’ve ramped up the salads and lean protein and cut out the crap. We all know what we are suppose to do, we just don’t do it. And let’s face it: a hamburger tastes a hell of a lot better than a salad. Don’t forget some greasy French fries and a nice vanilla milkshake. Yum! Ok, back to reality….

The reality is that I’m eating better and doing some killer workouts. Bigger, stronger, faster…right? The nice part is that I’m not totally out of shape. The bad part is that I have that damn spare tire around my belly. Belly flat is the worst. Ugh. So I’m focusing on fat burner workouts and muscle building activities to double down on the fat burning.

That’s the Friday update from the Anderson Island ferry. Have a fun weekend! Feel free to leave sarcastic comments, ideas, or a little of both below. At least click the “like” button!

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Curriculum Night: How my Child will learn to Become a Mid-Level Management Suck Up

~ K ~ 2 Comments

This evening I went to my daughter‘s “curriculum” night at her school. This just happens to be my last one for elementary school. Have you forgotten about curriculum night? Or maybe you are a bad parent and have never attended one before? Basically, the teacher tells you what your child will be learning over the course of the year. In the great State of Washington, goals have changed and the names of the goals have changed. We’ve had WASL goals, we’ve had Iowa tests, we’ve had critical thinking goals, MAPSAT, BS Goals, etc. The acronyms keep rolling out and the goals keep changing but it all comes down to this: we want our kids grow up with a decent brain inside their heads.

I’m all for progress and helping my child become a world thinker who is compassionate and uses critical thinking in their ever changing world of shifting paradigms while at the same time becoming a global citizen that needs to manage her own future. How about that? Is that a “mission statement” or what?

One of the new math concepts is for our students to work on the computer solving problems. Really? The teacher had a sample problem involving pizza and two kids. One kid was named Lucas. All I was thinking while she was showing us the math word problem was that Lucas was a fat pig who shouldn’t be eating 3/8 of the cheese pizza, 4/8 of the pepperoni, and ¼ of another one. That Lucas kid is going to be one fat ass kid with weight and self-esteem issues if he keeps pigging out. Poor Lucas.  Did Lucas think he found the best Seattle pizza?

Welcome back to School!
Welcome back to School!

My other concern was that it was fairly stupid to being solving this math problem on a computer. A good old pencil and paper would be a lot quicker and easier to use. How are they going to do the math on the fly if the computer isn’t there? Hmm? Are the children of today (and tomorrow) going to be able to do math without the use of a pull down menu? Could they mix art and math together and sketch out the problem on paper with a pencil and still figure it out?

Really, all I saw was that our schools were teaching our kids to rely on a computer to create a whole bunch of extra work to solve a simple math word problem. They can make pie graphs, charts, etc. That’s great but it is a simple problem. They don’t need to make a ten page report on it that is a waste of everyone’s time. Are we creating a society of mid-level managers that make reports for the heck of it and to justify their jobs?

“I have that twenty page report on why we shouldn’t eating Twinkles!” Conclusion: Uh, because they are bad for us? Or maybe we should eat them because it helps the fitness industry keep fitness instructors employed?

Over the years, I’ve learned that you need to watch less TV, get off the worthless texting and Instagram, Facebook, social media sites, and read more nonfiction (that was a big one tonight) and classic novels. I would also add you need to get out and experience life. Take the kids to museums, road trips, ferry boat rides, hikes, walks, boat rides, and feel the wind in your face.

Don’t get me wrong; I love the internet as much as you do. All the information at your fingertips, merely a click away…it’s wonderful.

Yet, I’m just as guilty as other parents and their children in letting social media run our lives. I have a hard time disconnecting from my iPhone. I have slowed down my use of social media. I have tried to make a deliberate effort not to check my phone when I’m doing activities with the family. I try to ignore that email buzz on my phone. It is hard. Sometimes I’m good and other times I’m not.

What are your thoughts about using only computers for school work these days? Will it work?

 

Welcome to The Fat Ass Dad’s Weight Loss Challenge….

~ K ~ 10 Comments

Welcome to The Fat Ass Dad’s Weight Loss Challenge

Yes, I’ve decided to drop some weight before our family’s trip to Maui in February 2015. Now, I know you are like Cyndi (My Imaginary Stalker) and think I look awesome all the time. It’s true; I do look fantastic. Sure, I’m now a bit older and I have a few extra pounds around my gut (SNL Middle Age Man Skit “You’re staring at my gut, aren’t you? I’m working on it”). However, let’s be realistic; we all need to get into better shape. I know everyone admires my huge arms, my broad shoulders, my beautiful smile, my charming wit, and my slick bald head. Yet, my big fat belly doesn’t do the rest of me justice. It needs to go.

Last Christmas, my friend and I noticed we both had risen to new heights on the bathroom scale. I think after the holidays I tipped in at 240 lbs. I skipped the Five Stages of Grief and did a little something about it. I dropped my weight down to 225. However, last summer (July 2013), I was 213 lbs. Currently, I’m coming in at 226 lbs. My goal is 200-205 lbs. by the time I walk on that plane for Maui in February.  I want to wear that neon green speedo on the beaches of Maui and embarrass my kids.  Did I just make you puke it your mouth a bit with that visual?  Good….

I’m putting it out there. I now have published my goal weight on my blog for Cyndi and my three other followers to read about. Don’t worry; my wife doesn’t read my blog so she doesn’t even care if I publish it. She would probably like it that I now have Cyndi and three followers holding me accountable. Heaven help me.

So where does the Fat Ass Dad’s Weight Loss Challenge come in? Over the past nine months (and years), a few of my friends have all talked about losing weight, eating better, drinking less. I decided it is time for the rubber to meet the road. I went ahead and challenged (invited) them to stop talking and do something about it.

The Rules:

There are no rules and we don’t talk about….just kidding, you have to have a Fight Club reference, right?

We have a $40 buy in so basically I’ll be winning $160 in February. They have no self-control. It will be easy money. (This is called trash talking and it is what men do to each other to encourage them). I also plan to sabotage their efforts with pizzas and beer.

I’ll give them false hope by saying things like:

“One more beer won’t hurt.”

“A bucket of hot wings isn’t that bad.”

“Man, you are looking trim. You got this contest in the bag…here, have another piece of cheesecake.”

The Weigh In (Start Weight) is an honor one. We have told each other our starting weight and our goal weight. I set the official end date of February 16, 2015. As you know, my start weight is 226 with a goal of at least 205 but I’d like 200. I have to crush it and take it all.

I’ll maybe give you a progress report once in a while. I don’t want to tip my hand to the other losers involved.

 

Your comments, exercise tips, healthy snack tips, are welcome. You can also post your weight loss stories if you like. And if you have any extremely bad weight gaining recipes, send them over too. I’ll change the title and send it to the rest of the Fat Ass Dads and tell them it is a low fat recipe.

Back to School and a Ruined Labor Day Weekend

~ K ~ Leave a comment

Here in Washington State, our school kids don’t go back to school until the last week of August or the first week of September. In fact, my kids went back to school on August 28. In comparison, the Seattle School District started yesterday September 3, 2014. This makes a heck of a lot more sense than starting August 28, going to school for two days, and then having Labor Day weekend off. It puts a bitter taste on the last week of August and Labor Day. You can’t milk summer out for a bit longer. Instead, you must think of getting your kids back in time for starting school on Thursday before Labor Day weekend.

It isn’t like anything is done the first two days of school when you have Labor Day weekend right there. Everyone knows that Thursday and Friday (before the Labor Day weekend) are “throwaway” days of education. You might as well let the kids watch TV because they sure aren’t paying attention to the teachers during those two days of school.

Labor Day Weekend wasn’t ruined for me. I always have fun. This year instead of heading to Anderson Island for the three day weekend, we went camping at Sun Lakes State Park. It was a good choice because we left the rain behind. Sun Lakes is located on the eastern side of Washington, roughly three hours away from our house. While western Washington might be experiencing rain and misery, the eastern side of the state will have sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns. Well, maybe not unicorns and rainbows but you get the idea. The weather is nice. We don’t have lots of rain and huddle under blue tarps. In eastern Washington, we don’t do the “blue tarp” camping made famous on the west side of the state. In eastern Washington, you slap on the sun block (SPF 45) and a big hat

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What lurks beneath the waters of this lake?
What lurks beneath the waters of this lake?

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It's all fun and games until someone falls off the cliffs!
It’s all fun and games until someone falls off the cliffs!

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On the negative side, it was windy in the evenings and the state park was full. Truth be told, it was very windy and miserable in that respect. The first night was bad. The tent was flapping around, keeping both myself and my wife wide awake. You would drift off to sleep, and then a gust of wind would pop up and wake you up. The second night, the wind was just as bad but I wore my ear plugs and I enjoyed the evening a bit more.

Sun Lakes State Park has a few different lakes within the park boundaries. On Sunday, we hiked along the Deep Lake Trail which was about 2 to 2.5 miles round trip. It goes right along the lake and is an easy hike. There is an opportunity to do some cliff diving or jumping off the cliff edge but we didn’t do it this trip. Perhaps next time we can jump off some basalt rock cliffs into the water below, have a scary monster grab us and drag us under.

I did manage to get some swimming in Sun Lake itself with my daughter and her friend. The weather was a bit cloudy, the wind was blowing, and the water was a little colder than I would have preferred. However, it was probably going to be the last swim of summer so I toughed it out. I’m not a little baby (well, I really am but I try to act tough).

My son and I also did a twilight walk where he was almost hit by a bat. Lots of bats on the Park Lake Trail, however I can’t complain about the bats because they keep the bug population down. Go bats!

Overall, the camping trip was a good one. No flat tires, no lost sleeping bags. The drive home wasn’t too bad. I’d go again but probably opt for a RV campsite further and with less wind.

 

Thanks for reading and your comments are always welcome!