Kevin Hellriegel's Blog of Worthless Advice

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Tag Archives: sex

Giving back to the community by being a drunk!

Today is one of those rainy wet days you’d expect living here in the Seattle region. Luckily, today I’m giving back to the community as an alcoholic drunk. As a volunteer, I’ll be hoisting multiple alcoholic beverages (whisky and scotch are my drinks of choice) and doing my civic duty in the “wet lab” at the Washington State Criminal Justice Training Commission (WSCJTC) in Burien. Basically, I get to drink all day, eat lunch, hang out with other volunteers, and allow the trainees to give me some field sobriety field tests, etc.

I have to drink until I’m drunk or to a mutually agreeable upon level of being trashed. I couldn’t drive myself here and I can’t leave until I am at .03. In Washington State, DUI/DWI is .08. Now, I’m no expert at drinking or DWI/DUI law and I can’t even tell you which crime is worse: a DUI or a DWI. I just know I don’t want to get one!

Anyway, this is my first time doing this type of volunteering. Most of my other volunteering work is on the tamer side where I need to be sober 24/7. This definitely will be a change of pace and an interesting way to start the weekend.

Have a great Friday!

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How Not To Be That Idiot Driver

I’m not much of a commuter so when I do have to drive somewhere, I pride myself on not being an idiot. I know where I am going and what freeways and exits I need to take. I know where the problems will be and when I should merge or exit.

Today, some idiot decided she needed to merge in front of me without bothering to look. She must have known she had three choices: speed up on the on ramp and cut me off, crash into me, or stay at her present speed and gently merge in behind me. As we know from my present tone that she cut me off.

Now, I didn’t blare my horn, tailgate her, or even get that upset. I just shook my head in amazement. Seriously, it was that important to get ahead of me in your Blue Tahoe? Like it made the traffic go that much faster? And don’t bother to look at me as you merge, the rest of us will gladly watch out for your vehicle this morning.

I did catch up to her as I neared my final destination and she was texting on her phone. I honestly could have cut back in front of her, slammed on my brakes, caused an accident, and gotten a new work truck out of it.

But I didn’t.

And I live to write another day without back pain!

Thanks for allowing me to vent and release.

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