So why don’t you get off your lazy butt and write something?
OK folks. I’ve been quite neglectful in my blog writing. Sure, I could blame it on the holiday season and say I was too busy hanging up my holiday lights all over my house, my trees, my rocks, my roof to write anything remotely exciting (or sarcastic for that matter). But the truth is (since we are being honest, aren’t we?) I have been lazy for the past month or two.
Maybe I’m in the mist of trying to discover myself? Or perhaps the hot butter rum was just so delightful that I could hardly string a few words together to make a sentence much less write a blog for you to read.
Even my imaginary stalker Cyndi is disappointed in my lack of writing. I’m sorry to let her and you down.
I didn’t even wish you a Happy New Year and it is already January 7 of 2014! Man, I am scum, aren’t I?
Let’s start writing, shall we? Let’s talk about your New Year’s Resolutions that will fail miserably. My worthless advice: Never make New Year’s Resolutions. You are setting yourself up for failure. Instead, commit to a lifestyle change for the better (why would anyone make a change for the worse?). Choose to exercise more and to eat healthier. Choose to read a good novel, choose to drink less alcohol, choose to limit your Facebook time stalking your ex-girlfriend (or ex-spouse), choose to get your finances in order, choose to follow my blog by subscribing to it. Just make the choice to improve yourself. Certainly subscribing and promoting (and sharing) my blog is a good choice for you.
See? Isn’t that better than a worthless New Year’s Resolution? Make better choices in life. And your spouse says I never write anything “uplifting” in my blog. Poppycock I say!
I look forward to offering a new batch of worthless advice to you and your fellow mankind in 2014! Let the games begin!