March 21, 2017
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Ah, March 28 is National Hot Tub Day according to some random website I stumbled upon when I was bored one evening (who says this internet isn’t helpful and only spreads “fake news”?). Throw on your speedo, thong, or your bikini, play some Kenny G, and hit the hot tub because it is National Hot Tub Day!!
On a side tangent, I noticed that romance writers love hot tubs. They write the hot tubs into their stories all the time. Yes, I read romance novels. In between rapid reading of my gun magazines, truck magazines, and muscle car magazines, resides my collection of romance novels. Since I am a caring and sensitive guy (just ask my imaginary stalker Cyndi), you know that I am a great fan of romance novels.
But let’s get back to the focus of National Hot Tub Day and that is Hot Tubs. Hot tubs are a wonderful way to soak away your problems and worries. It’s like a vacation at your own home. I like to make sure my hot tub is properly maintained. Lucky for me, I don’t have sensitive skin, just sensitive feelings. OK, we know I don’t have any feelings but we still want to have some nice hot tub water.
Lately, we have had some cold and rainy weather. After all, it is Seattle and we don’t get sunshine until July. I’ve been feeling cold lately, so I love to enjoy the hot tub when it is chilly out. My muscles and joint loosen up and I can just sit there and float. For roughly 15 minutes, I can just relax. I can pretend I’m at a ski resort or on the beach on the island of Kauai.
Tips for Successful Hot Tub Party Day:
What if you don’t have a hot tub? Find a friend or a neighbor that has one. Then invite yourself over on National Hot Tub Day. You owe it to them to honor this day!
Avoid Alcohol – Wait, what? Yes, we all know I enjoy a nice whiskey but alcohol and hot tubs aren’t a good mix. Hot Tub water dilutes your cocktail too much. The warm water in your hot tub can speed up the process of inebriation, and can increase your chances of a hangover
Avoid Falling Asleep in the Hot Tub – you should focusing on the soaking and relaxing of the hot water. Enjoy this moment, save sleeping for your bed.
Have Music – What to play? Some Depeche Mode? Some Kenny G? Some Lady Gaga remix? The theme from the movie “Jaws”? It’s up to you, but don’t keep that stereo or iPhone too close to the hot tub. You don’t want your imaginary friends to knock it in.
Have Extra Towels Available – you know some goofball will forget his towel and then wander around your house looking for one. That’s a good way to ruin your hardwood floors. Have a stack of old towels ready for him.
Clean! – Keep the area around your hot tub clean. Vacuum up all the lose dirt, dog hair, old fern leaves, and candy wrappers. You don’t want to drag all that stuff into your hot tub.
Take A Shower – Encourage your guest to shower BEFORE they come over to hot tub. The less body oils, old sweat, stripper dust, and daily dirt you have coming into the hot tub, the better! It cuts down on chemical use.
Check the Chemical Levels – You should be doing daily or weekly check of the chemicals. Use those water test strips.
Those are my awesome (or rather worthless) hot tub tips for National Hot Tub Day! I know you won’t bother to play attention to them but at least pretend you read the whole blog post and give it a big “LIKE”. Can you do that? Thanks!