Kevin Hellriegel's Blog of Worthless Advice

The only blog that you really want to read…or ignore.

Tag Archives: novel

Curriculum Night: How my Child will learn to Become a Mid-Level Management Suck Up

This evening I went to my daughter‘s “curriculum” night at her school. This just happens to be my last one for elementary school. Have you forgotten about curriculum night? Or maybe you are a bad parent and have never attended one before? Basically, the teacher tells you what your child will be learning over the course of the year. In the great State of Washington, goals have changed and the names of the goals have changed. We’ve had WASL goals, we’ve had Iowa tests, we’ve had critical thinking goals, MAPSAT, BS Goals, etc. The acronyms keep rolling out and the goals keep changing but it all comes down to this: we want our kids grow up with a decent brain inside their heads.

I’m all for progress and helping my child become a world thinker who is compassionate and uses critical thinking in their ever changing world of shifting paradigms while at the same time becoming a global citizen that needs to manage her own future. How about that? Is that a “mission statement” or what?

One of the new math concepts is for our students to work on the computer solving problems. Really? The teacher had a sample problem involving pizza and two kids. One kid was named Lucas. All I was thinking while she was showing us the math word problem was that Lucas was a fat pig who shouldn’t be eating 3/8 of the cheese pizza, 4/8 of the pepperoni, and ¼ of another one. That Lucas kid is going to be one fat ass kid with weight and self-esteem issues if he keeps pigging out. Poor Lucas.  Did Lucas think he found the best Seattle pizza?

Welcome back to School!

Welcome back to School!

My other concern was that it was fairly stupid to being solving this math problem on a computer. A good old pencil and paper would be a lot quicker and easier to use. How are they going to do the math on the fly if the computer isn’t there? Hmm? Are the children of today (and tomorrow) going to be able to do math without the use of a pull down menu? Could they mix art and math together and sketch out the problem on paper with a pencil and still figure it out?

Really, all I saw was that our schools were teaching our kids to rely on a computer to create a whole bunch of extra work to solve a simple math word problem. They can make pie graphs, charts, etc. That’s great but it is a simple problem. They don’t need to make a ten page report on it that is a waste of everyone’s time. Are we creating a society of mid-level managers that make reports for the heck of it and to justify their jobs?

“I have that twenty page report on why we shouldn’t eating Twinkles!” Conclusion: Uh, because they are bad for us? Or maybe we should eat them because it helps the fitness industry keep fitness instructors employed?

Over the years, I’ve learned that you need to watch less TV, get off the worthless texting and Instagram, Facebook, social media sites, and read more nonfiction (that was a big one tonight) and classic novels. I would also add you need to get out and experience life. Take the kids to museums, road trips, ferry boat rides, hikes, walks, boat rides, and feel the wind in your face.

Don’t get me wrong; I love the internet as much as you do. All the information at your fingertips, merely a click away…it’s wonderful.

Yet, I’m just as guilty as other parents and their children in letting social media run our lives. I have a hard time disconnecting from my iPhone. I have slowed down my use of social media. I have tried to make a deliberate effort not to check my phone when I’m doing activities with the family. I try to ignore that email buzz on my phone. It is hard. Sometimes I’m good and other times I’m not.

What are your thoughts about using only computers for school work these days? Will it work?

 

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Did I hurt your feelings about Killing your Dreams?

Yesterday, I offered my dream killing services to my devoted readers (which consists of my mother and my imaginary stalker Cyndi).  It was met with overwhelming support and I have been killing your dreams all day long.  It is hard work, dashing your dreams and hopes on the rocky shores of reality but I have gladly accepted this task to help you better yourself.

You can thank me later for slapping your face hard with the stick of reality.

Am I saying you should give up on your dreams?

Yes, if your dreams are unrealistic.  Oh, wait!  What is Kevin’s definition of unrealistic?  My definition of unrealistic is simple.  You won’t win the Powerball Lottery (Sorry, someone in Florida just won the $590 million), you won’t be the next Bill Gates, and you probably won’t be curing cancer.  Seriously, if you were on track to be the next Bill Gates would you be reading my worthless advice blog?  Uh, probably not.

I will say that if you want to be successful you need to discontinue reading my worthless advice blog.  Sure, you’ll enjoy my sarcastic wit and my blog will bring endless joy it to your miserable life but it is still a distraction.  It will merely derail you from setting your goals, making a plan, executing your plan, and accomplishing something.

But then again, the lure of my worthless advice is just so enticing, isn’t it?  I’m pretty enjoyable, aren’t I?

See you did it again….you lost focus.

Let’s circle back to reality.  No, matter how much I try, not all my advice is worthless advice.  Here I am giving you hope after I have smashed your dreams and fantasies.  The truth is that it is OK to have your dreams and fantasies.  But if you are serious about something, you need to take action.  Put your fear aside and write that novel.  Even if it sucks, at least you did it, you tried, you took a risk and went outside your comfort zone.

Good luck on those dreams of yours.  I’m still available if you need someone to destroy your dreams.

As always, your comments and insights are always welcome.  Leave a comment and tell me how much you hate my quest to kill your dream.

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